FUCK THE BANKS
Banks are really great for society. Debt is the best! Go democracy! It’s great to pay tax and buy property! Yay! Lets support the economy! Catch the train and get a job in the CBD. Get yourself a degree from university. Wars are good for humanity! And there’s no such thing as the illuminati. You could be rich like your boss one day. Keep doing your job. Everything’s okay. You’ll get a paid holiday soon! Better save up your frequent flyer points! We think rich people are great. The one percent are just like you and me. They do normal things like normal people. There’s nothing suss about Bohemian Grove. Boom, Boom, Boom! This is just another song. Ring-a-Ding Ding! Nothing special about this one. We wish they’d put this song on the radio – Because we’re attention seeking fame whores. That’s normal behavior. The UN is great! Nations working together – They only do good things like ending poverty. Everything you see on the news is a fact. DOM AND ADRIAN AREN’T EVEN OUR REAL NAMES! There’s nothing weird about the moon, it’s normal. If you think otherwise, you’re mentally ill. Reality is exactly what it looks like, nothing more. Go buy nice things from a department store. The Rothschilds and the Rockefellers are great. What’s so bad about a one world government anyway? “Chemtrails” are just exhaust fumes from jet engines. Snopes is a trustworthy source of information! It takes money to make money! Keep saving! Corporations are cool and amazing! It’s great that Governments can read our emails! You’ve got nothing to be afraid of! Boom, Boom, Boom! This is just a normal song, Ring-a-Ding Ding, nothing special about this one. Our real names are Christiaan and Nick – We’ve got girlfriends, and Christiaan has kids. Buying nice things is really great – Money is real, and currency is great. You should work harder and save some more money – Then buy a house, and pay it off before you die. It’s healthy to watch more TV – TV is great for your brain, you see. Famous people are just normal people – When you meet them… they’re normal. … Same… Celebrities do things for charity! – They raise awareness of world issues! Rupert Murdoch is very successful and cool! I pay for all my entertainment! You should watch entertainment legally! Soft drinks aren’t THAT bad for you. Corporations have our best interests at heart – And Lizard People aren’t a thing. In all seriousness though, guys – If anyone from the Illuminati is watching – Please reach out to us, ASAP. We’re sick and tired of struggling. We’ll do anything to get into the Illuminati. We’ll finger a fish, fuck a squirrel, whatever. We’ll totally even suck off old dudes. We’d kill a person if that’s what you want. Boom, Boom, Boom! This is just another normal song! Ring-a-Ding Ding, nothing special about this one! DOM AND ADRIAN AREN’T EVEN OUR REAL NAMES! We’re Christiaan and Nick, and we’ll kill a person! It feels like our shitty careers have peaked – We’ve done all we can without the dark lord Lucifer’s help and guidance. We find the entertainment industry quite stressful. So come on, please… Let us join the Illuminatiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. Triangle, triangle, eye, pyramid, sun, eye.